Period.

I love how Nerina Pallot has been serenading (for the lack of an appropriate word) me with her songs.

After sitting down and listening to the clear, empty sounds, bouncing off my four walls, I realised:

I miss my brother.

I want him home.

I miss his noise and crazy antics, that no one else sees but me.

04 February, please come soon.

My brother rambled nonsense before he left. Things like, "I might die and never come back." I wanted to grab him and never let go. Not because I believed it would happen, but because even if that were to happen one day, I'd still love him the same.

I've had dreams about losing my loved ones. Some dreams made me lose the 3 of them all at once. But they weren't nightmares, just thoughts. It scared me stiff, because I can't bring myself to imagine how that would make me feel. It might cause a nervous breakdown, and more. Much more.

This was my favourite shot from the trip we took to Korea as a family with my Grandmother.

And this is family.
I can't explain the sleeplessness, not in this season, not at this time. Feels strange and yet, it's strangely familiar. You're tired, but you can't get to sleep. I've been stuck in this cycle since last week and I'm, not tired.

But I love strangely familiar. Since when have I not?

Maybe that explains why I might be strange. I might be, a st.ran.ge person. But God loves His people, regardless of form, character or personality. And I am living in a shadow no more.

Nicky, I found the song you were looking for.